Now that I am in paid employment, I need to sort my money out and number one on my need-to-sort-my-money-out-list is to break up with my credit card, hence why I have penned the following letter:
My dearest CC (it stands for credit card people),
I think it is time I stopped seeing you.
Don’t get me wrong, it has been a pretty good 20 months - if good reads being able to make purchases abroad without incurring any overseas charges/fees and me enjoying all the new additions (mostly designer pieces) to my wardrobe which will almost forever stay with me. Saying that, there have been some regrets: like the one or two (perhaps even three) hasty purchases bought amidst the frenzied hectic-ness of a sample sale to the very unplanned+unnecessary refined sugar/high sodium snacks I was unable to resist purchasing while walking past a Tesco/Starbucks/Sainsburys. But the major regret has to be me addictively living and relying on you CC, like you were my actual own money, constantly using you to tap and enter my pin or long card details much more times then needed.
Things were actually going well in terms of how we rolled: as you know CC up until 5 months ago I would pay off my balance each month in full via transferring money from my savings to cover what was owed. But then my savings got all transferred out aka I had no more money. Hence why paying off the bare minimum plus some each month became my norm, while my spending escalated and thus impacting me more than I wanted to admit.
So like most relationships founded and built on unequal parts of commitment (you was the giver CC, while I was definitely the taker), there is no future for us. This thing that we have: it’s unhealthy, somewhat toxic and damaging to my credit, hence why I choose to let you go. Plus since I have a job now there is no real use for you, so it’s due time for me to be an adult, a responsible one. And while I know your parents (the bank aka Virgin Money) was hoping that this would be some sort of a long-term arrangement, I only needed you CC for the short term. So yes, I have been using you all this time for my own selfish uncontrollable gain.
I only ask you give me a couple of weeks, so heads up we have until the end of November to sort ourselves out (really reads: for me to pay you off). I’m going to hold onto the holidays, expensive shoes and dinner dates you bought me, firstly as a reminder of the enjoyment we had, secondly because I’m not stupid enough to give them back. But please I admonish you stay strong: you served your purpose for the season, so our time together was not in vain. Take care of yourself CC.
With love (I think).
I noticed that your parents (Virgin Money) increased my card limit, please tell them that they are not helping the situation at all.